1 Mo-Vember 2009 (Sunday) - Return to the Duck House I woke feeling surprisingly chirpy today. I
went to bed last night feeling decidedly ill. Not the beer (for once),
but I had a temperature, and my tonsils were like tennis balls. I was
suspecting I’d finally gone down with swine flu, having caught something
dodgy off of someone dodgy at yesterday’s record breaker. But whatever it was
is in abeyance (at least for now), so I shall be grateful for small mercies. Up earlier than I would have hoped on a
Sunday morning, but next door’s dogs are noisy. If next door isn’t up and
about by 7.30am, their dogs start screaming. They don’t bark, they actually
do scream. They made that noise for about forty minutes until someone next
door finally shouted at the pups. By which time I was wide awake. Mind you, I
don’t really mind the noise. Or that of the piano on the other side. I feel
it gives us licence to make as much racket as we like. Another video of yesterday’s extravaganza has
been brought to my attention. You might want to see it here. Dave H
appears at one minute twenty two seconds into the clip, and is visible for a good
ten seconds– look out for the top hat. Simon, Tina & me can be seen (fleetingly)
at one minute forty nine seconds. Despite the torrential rain, a duck house and
a mallard house were ready to be floated, so braving the elements we set off
to the farm, loaded up the trailer, and off to the pond we went. The duck
house was going into a pond in which there had never been any king of avian
residence, so we needed to install a rope arrangement across the pond.
There’s only one way to do that, and this year was someone else’s turn to
swim the duck pond in November. Me – I just shouted helpful comments and sage
advice. The mallard house was (in theory) easier since I’d installed the
ropes last year, and all we had to do was put the mallard house on the water,
tie it to the rope and pull it across. A shame that I fell in, really…. P.S. - It’s that time of year again when the
razor goes into the cupboard for a month. Charity moustache growing is the
order of the day. Or month. This year I’ve decided to go for the full beard.
I know that’s not in the rules for Mo-Vember, but
I’m claiming some poetic licence. Feel free to sponsor the thing by
clicking here.
And should any of my loyal readers click on the link, they will be forgiven
for wondering who “t Styles” is. The Mo-Vember
website isn’t what it was last year. It’s lost all my details from last time,
but recognises the email address I used and won’t let me use it again. Then
the re-registering thing kept crashing, so after an hour’s struggling only to
end up as “t Styles” I thought I’d cut my losses and make the most of what it
would allow me to do. So hand over your cash, or
start growing your own moustache, or both…. |
2 Mo-Vember 2009 (Monday) - The Dentist (and E.L.O.) My mouth wasn’t right today. The thing didn’t
close properly, so I phoned the dentist. One good thing of having DenPlan dental insurance is that if I have a gob
malfunction, I’m usually seen promptly. The fang-quack had a look, and then
asked me what the problem was. So I told him again, and he had another
rummage (to no avail). So I tried to direct him to the problem area as best I
could, with my trap full of his assorted appurtenances. He then laughed a
little, and was rather dismissive. It would seem I have an impacted wisdom
tooth. These are ten a penny when you’re a dentist. They get infected and
painful from time to time. The swelling is the inflammation. (dur!) He didn’t
actually say that surely any fool knows that, but the implication was
there. He’s given me some foul mouthwash and said to go back if it’s
still playing up in two weeks time. If it continues to be a pain, then he may
consider removing it surgically. I had a wisdom tooth out once before. About
twenty years ago. It was a tad traumatic, as I recall. I would have thought
that at 45 (and two thirds) years old I was too old to be having wisdom
teeth. I’ve left that rather late. But then again, that’s the kind of guy I am.
I’ve had a slosh around with the foul mouthwash and I had a practice at
scoffing with a bag of crisps (for experimental purposes). To be fair to the
fang-quack I can get my gob more closed than I could earlier, but it’s still
on the swollen side. I wonder if the dentist was put off by my beard. Whilst
it’s still in the early stages, there’s no denying the thing puts me off
every time I look in the mirror. On Saturday I went to Yesterday I posted a link on Facebook. The
Electric Light Orchestra was one of the “Big Things” in my teenage years
(along with the Boys Brigade, crackpot religion, CB radio, underage drinking
and fishing). The Concerto for a Rainy Day seemed quite appropriate for
yesterday’s foul weather. My Facebook posting attracted some comments -
apparently there’s an ELO tribute band which will be playing (relatively)
locally on the Saturday before my birthday at 7.30pm. Tickets are twelve quid
each. I might just go along to Tenterden to see them. If any of my loyal
readers fancy a night out next February, please let me know a.s.a.p. and I’ll
see about booking tickets. Or that is, ‘er
indoors TM will book them along with my birthday pressie… |
3 Mo-Vember 2009 (Tuesday) - National Pathology Week Today my blog hit counter stormed over the
5000 mark. That’s an average of 31 visits a day. I’m impressed with that. I
would seem to be getting readers from all over the world. To the town centre at 8am to set up our
display. We had been offered the use of not one but two “retail merchandising
units” for our National
Pathology Week display. There was a minor hiccup in that the things
didn’t come with light bulbs, but the nice security man gave us a box of
light bulbs. Or, more accurately, a box of empty light bulb boxes. Eventually
he came up trumps with a carrier bag full of light bulbs. We eventually got the displays into position
– we found ourselves wasting time getting artistic with the design. There was
a slight problem with the helium balloons. In that we only had ten balloons
and the helium had run out. So we decided to just blow them up, Six burst
during inflation, which left us with four. Still, we had enough pens, rulers
and gonks to equip a decent sized army so the children wouldn’t go away empty
handed. And then the general public arrived. I think
it’s probably fair to say that most of the general public totally ignored our
stall. I kept a weather eye on the local pikeys, who were keeping a weather
eye on the lap-tops on our stall. And then four of us spent the day being
civil to our visitors who fell into four broad categories: visiting
management, visiting friends, colleagues and family, ex-patients, and passing
nutters. And with all respect to my loyal readers who took the time to visit
the stall, I’m afraid I had most fun with the passing nutters. The first was quite open. She told me that
she was a looney, and asked if she could have a free pen for her mother. She
was rather taken aback when I gave her a pen. After all, we had several
hundred to give away, courtesy of our sponsor. One little old lady told me that she suffers
from pains which shoot from her oxter right up to her lisk.
I told here there had been a lot of that going about since the clocks went
back, and she went away quite happy. Another “dinger” read every word on all of the posters on our displays, then loudly announced
she’d had all the blood tests and it wasn’t that. She then marched off rather
proudly before I could ask what wasn’t that. A rather scary looking chap informed me that
he takes heart pills for his heart, water pills for his water and he’s had a
vein taken out of his leg. And then asked me what it was all about. A particularly smelly oik told me how he
suffered with irritable bowel syndrome, and asked me to explain the poster on
the subject to him. He mentioned the phrase “eye of a needle” several times,
but I could smell that. And one chap picked up a gonk and made it
vanish into thin air. It just went. He then produced his calling card (out of
thin air too). He was one of the chaps from Wilko’s who did magic tricks in his spare time. I
was impressed. We also had praise for the NHS from many of the
public. One young mother was so vocal about how good the hospital is with her
son who has sickle cell disease. I lost count of the amount of people who’d
had kidney transplants. And people who’d had joint replacements and all sorts
of other surgery. For all that I moan about working for the NHS, today made
me quite proud to be part of something marvellous. There was only one person
who grumbled about the NHS. This was a rather unfortunate looking fellow who
wasn’t happy that the NHS had closed his hospital, and now he has to go out
to work. Whilst up town I took the liberty of nipping
to the optician. I started off with various tests on eye pressure, nerve and
muscle responses, and they even photographed my retinas before I got in to
what I would call the “proper eye test”. I was subjected to all sorts of eye
charts and all sorts of eye lenses, and then told that for normal to long
range I’d got an “eye size” worse, and for close up stuff I’d got two “eye
sizes” worse. Which was rather what I expected. So a new pair of specs was
something of a necessity. The last time I blogged about the optician (14
November 2007) I whinged about the cost. No whinge this time. I bought my
current specs some four years ago (18 October 2005). The pair I bought today
were one hundred quid cheaper. “Daddies Little Angel TM ” came up
to visit at mid day, and we went off for some McLunch.
You can’t beat a Quarter-Pounder with fries and a banana shake. |
4 Mo-Vember 2009 (Wednesday) - A Day in the Life I turned off the pond’s filtration system for
the winter since all it will do is chill the water. No more food for the fish
until March. Just as well they’ve put on weight over the summer. Next door has had metal fences put up, and…
well, to be honest, I’m not sure. The people next door mentioned about
getting a quote to have metal fences put round some time ago, and said they’d
get us a quote too. At the time I was all for the idea, and it was that which
spurred me on to paint the front of the house a few weeks ago. The company
next door spoke with never got back to them, and in the end, they did the
fences themselves. Now I’ve seen them, I’m not sure if I like them. I had
this plan to get the same fences as they had, so it would all look alike. But
if I’m going to get the same, I’m going to need to build up the brick pillar
between my house and the other side. And I’m not keen on that. So, anyway, I was up with the lark, and round
to B&Q to look at their metal fences. After all, that’s where next door
got theirs from. But the panels they used are about a foot too tall, and they
don’t seem to make anything lower. There’s a wrought iron specialist in
Tenterden – I’ll give them a ring in the morning, maybe. And then to Tesco’s to get my salad. For all
that they open early, they don’t like people doing their shopping early. Or, to be more precise, the poor saps who are on the early
shift don’t. They delight in deliberately dragging their trolleys and
assorted luggage into the way of all the shopping public. And then making
very loud sighs and clucks when they pretend that they’ve only just noticed
the poor shopper that they’ve nearly run over. And during the mid afternoon my phone battery
went flat. I was impressed. Ever since I got my new phone, it would last no
more than a day between charges. Yesterday I got a new battery, and the chap
said to put it in the phone, use the residual charge up and then charge it
for ….. blah-de-blah. The “residual charge” in the new battery has lasted as
long as the old battery would when fully charged. Let’s hope for the best
here. Some days in my life are rather eventful –
others not so… |
5 Mo-Vember 2009 (Thursday) - A Late Start Being on a late start I hoped for a bit of a
lie-in. I’ve heard this theory that for some people, they subconsciously
don’t like being woken. So having an alarm set means that they will wake
before that alarm goes off. But with no alarm, they will just sleep until
they wake naturally. That seems to be how it works for me. So I was just a
tad miffed to be woken by drills and assorted road working noises at 8am. Once the girls had gone, I set the washing
machine going and did the washing up. And was rather confused that I could
still hear running water once I’d filled the sink and turned the taps off.
The sleeve of a jumper was caught in the washing machine’s door, and water
was gushing out. Oh how I laughed, whilst I cleared up the floods. And then I had a mooch around Wickes and
Homebase for metal fences. I would have mooched more, but I was going to be
late for work. I think I’ll try some garden centres at the weekend. And
so to work, where I am reliably informed that my beard is the best of the half
a dozen being cultivated for Mo-Vember. If this is
the best, you can only imagine those at the other end of the spectrum. The idea for the evening was to go to the
fireworks at the catholic school in Folkestone, but seeing as I only had a
week’s notice that I was on a late tonight, I worked and sulked whilst others
went out. I didn’t finish work until an hour after the fireworks were all
done. Over on blogs linked to mine I see that two
very good friends of mine have (almost) simultaneously developed
diabetes. There’s a family history of late-onset diabetes in my tribe, so
it’s only a matter of time till I get it too. Perhaps my diet will postpone
the inevitable. In the last month or so of my diet I’ve lost over a stone and
a half. And the girls at work have (politely) told me that the roll of
fat on the back of my head has gone. That’s nice. Weight loss is dead easy.
No meat, no bread, no potatoes, no sweets. Less beer. More exercise. And eat with the smallest fork you can find.
You get *so* fed up with the mechanics of eating, you stop being hungry. That's what I'm doing at the moment, and the
weight is falling off. Granted the food you can eat can be a tad dull at
times.... but you can't have everything... Mind you. The recipe book we’re
using at home is pretty good. The scran’s not bad at the moment. “My Boy TM ” has
just bought me a present – a huge tube of pink smarties. Perhaps now isn’t a
good time to be admitting to that…. |
6 Mo-Vember 2009 (Friday) - Dull Up at the crack of dawn to iron shirts. Well,
I was up anyway, so I might as well do something constructive. I’ve been
watching my DVD of “Knowing Me Knowing You with Alan Partridge”
recently, and today I watched the last episode. Is this show really fifteen
years old? To Tesco which was just as dull as it always
is, and then to work which was also dull. I’ve been working at the same place
since September 1984, and I’m just bored with it now. And then home again. The plan was to go out
to the firework display at Biddenden tonight, but
it started raining. That was enough to put me off, so we stayed home. I
submitted my electric meter reading on line, and then signed up to check my
bills on line too. Regular readers of this drivel might remember that in
early June I grumbled about the gas board making changes to the amount of
money they were taking each month. After a bit of a squabble five months ago
I agreed to a slight increase in my monthly payments. I’m now nearly three
hundred quid in credit with them. I had this naïve idea that this money might
pay for my new specs and finance next week’s session at |
7 Mo-Vember 2009 (Saturday) - Wallabies, Hobgoblins and
Waitrose The instructions for my new phone battery
were to let the thing completely discharge before charging it for the second
time. So it completely discharged last night. And overnight it summoned up
enough power to set off the alarm at silly o’clock this morning. Just as well
as I was due in at work. And so to work, where we spent the morning listening
to Xmas CDs. And trying to tell the difference between The Darkness and Shakin’ Stevens. From work to The Blacksmith’s Arms. I’d
worked one Saturday morning over the summer, and we’d then met in the
Blacksmith’s for scoff, so it seemed to be a good idea to do it again. The
place is under new management, and wasn’t what it once was. Our food took an
age to arrive. And when it did, it wasn't what was ordered. The staff were
friendly enough, but in this competitive pub scene, there's better pubs out
there. Having said that, the place retains my score of 7/10 if only for the
ale selection. We then spent a while going round WyeVale and Bybrook Barn
checking out the garden requisites. Neither place stocked metal railings, but
I’ve got some other ideas for the garden. And then we had a shufti round
Badger’s Hill garden centre at Chilham. They didn’t
have what I wanted either, but they had some wallabies, which were fun to
watch. From here we thought we’d try the soup at the Halfway House in
Challock. Three ales, but the Hobgoblin was on the turn. We ran into Paul
& Cathy whilst in here. Seeing as they live fifty yards away, I hardly
ever see them, and a pleasant few minutes were spent chatting. Soup devoured,
and onto the last pub of the day – the Flying Horse at Boughton Aluph. Now under new management and refurbished,
it’s now got four ales on the hand pumps. There were only three when I
visited last (regular readers might recall I came here after my adventures
with the poly tunnel). It's one of those places I've been popping into on
the odd occasion for some years, and it looks like I will be continuing to do
so. And then home. Via Ashford’s latest shopping
experience – Waitrose. Which is everything I’ve ever considered the Waitrose
brand to be. Very good food, very posh, and a very extensive selection. But
they ain’t giving it away. I’m told (by those
who know about those things) that their milk, bread and general groceries
are reasonably priced. However, take for example my area of expertise in
supermarkets. I was impressed with the range of bottled beers. I’ve never
seen Ringwood beers in an Ashford supermarket before. Or TEA (from the
Hogsback brewery). Or “Bitter and Twisted” (an exceptionally
good ale). To be fair to Waitrose, they have got the best range of
bottled beers in any Ashford supermarket. But the range in Asda, Tesco or
Sainsbury’s isn’t bad, and their beers are cheaper. Similarly in my other
area of my expertise – I shall continue buying my salads from Tesco… And then with everyone else out and the house
to myself I did something I hardly ever do – I watched a film on the telly…. |
8 Mo-Vember 2009 (Sunday) - A Garden Project That infernal vicar was clanging his equally
infernal bell at 9am this morning. I wish he wouldn’t do that. After half an
hour’s continual noise, I was dressed and ready to march up the road to
complain, but he stopped at that point. I know I keep grumbling about the
church bell. One day I’ll have a go at the vicar. But not today. Instead I
added a calendar to the blog. I think it looks good, but then at heart I’m
just a sad trekkie. The plans for the day went out the window
when ‘er indoors TM announced that a niece
was having a roller disco party and we’d been invited (at one hour’s
notice). Over the years said niece has made her dislike of me quite
evident (you can’t be popular with everyone – or I can’t!!), so I
thought I’d give the party a miss. Instead I got a lift to the hospital to
collect my car. And then up to Bybrook Barn to
get the stuff for a garden
project I’ve been planning to do for weeks. There’s a load of
soil which comes out from under the fence in the front garden, and during the
summer the weeds in this area get to be over two feet tall. So, having made
the front of the house half-way decent over the last few months, I thought
I’d gravel over the problem bit. After all, I like gravelled areas. “My Boy TM ” is
always useful to have around when there’s work to be done. But he had a flat
battery in his mobile. Which was a shame – I was hoping he might help with
the fetching and carrying. I’ve done gravelling before, and whilst it’s a
straightforward job, some of it does require heavy lifting. I would have got
on quicker if we had any sharp scissors. The idea of a gravelled bit is to
stop weeds growing through. And the key to stopping the weeds is to lay down
a membrane which goes under the gravel. This membrane comes two metres wide,
and you then cut the stuff to size. Which is easier said than done, as you
need somthing sharp to cut it. We had plenty of
knives which chewed at it, but it took an age to find something that could
actually cut, rather than chew the membrane. And then a minor hiccup. It soon transpired
that I had too many edging stones and not enough gravel. So back to Bybrook Barn to ask the nice lady if I could do a swap.
Fortunately I had planned for this eventuality (I’ve done this before)
and had arranged with the nice lady that I might be back to change excess of
one for insufficiency of another. And the nice lady was incredibly helpful
too. Even allowing for an extra trip to the garden
centre, I had the job finished in less than two hours. Which wasn’t bad. It
would have gone a lot faster if I had the assistance of my padawan. Funny how
his phone battery goes flat at the most convenient times. He arrived home
half an hour after I’d finished, and said that I should have asked him to
help me (!) And then he went fishing. I then spent the afternoon making yet another
crossword to send in to the chokey. “A generously-proportioned lady who
honestly just eats like a mouse but whose glands scoff vast quantities of
deep-fried spuds (13)” (chippopotamus).
I’ve another eleven crosswords to compile before he’s released. With an
average of twenty clues per puzzle, that’s another two hundred and forty
clues I’ve got to devise. I’m going to struggle to come up with that. And
speaking of the chokey, “Norman Stanley” phoned just as I was about to
print this week’s letter to HMP Slade. Regular readers may recall an incident
involving policemen and immoral ladies’ calling cards from a few weeks ago (October
21). I had this idea to send in some cards advertising the services of
ladies of loose morals. Well, it seemed a good idea at the time. He never
received that letter, but has had ones I sent since. It’s odd how a
full-blown grumble mag got through, but they censored a tart’s calling card. And then to NeverWinter. The particular game
I’m playing at the moment has the most convoluted plot. I *think* I know what
I should be doing, but unless I start making some progress with it soon , I
shall give up and start another mod…. Beard Update: It looks awful,
and the sponsorship is still at zero…. |
9 Mo-Vember 2009 (Monday) - Stuff Last night when I came to print out “letter
to the chokey #42” I used the last sheet of paper, and had no envelopes
left. I wonder where they went (!) So after work, I was on a mission to
Staples for more stationary. A strange place. Loads of staff swarming here,
there and thither, but only one person on the tills, and that one not doing
especially good at reducing the queue. And then home to a letter from the optician.
Having been there last Tuesday and paid them a fortune for new specs, they’ve
now written to me to tell me I’m due for an eye test. Oh well…. Whilst on the
subject of glasses, the word on the street is that the work’s occupational
health department will pay towards the cost of new specs. That’s a bonus. My PC is on the blink. For some months when
booted up it has claimed to find new hardware. Even though there isn’t any
new hardware there for it to find. Today it failed to boot up Windows when I
turned it on. It’s done that twice in the last month. I’m beginning to wonder
if I should be looking at getting a new PC soon. After all, my current one is
now nearly three years old. I wonder if NeverWinter Nights runs on Windows 7.
If it doesn’t, Windows 7 can go whistle. Regular readers might recall that last Friday
I set up an account to sort out my leccie and gas
bills on-line. It hasn’t worked, so I phoned the leccie
people to sort out the problem. After a bit of to-ing and fro-ing they told
me that the problem was that it hadn’t worked. These leccie
people are very incisive, you know. They’ve now set up the account so’s I can
give them meter readings, and so’s they can tell me how much in credit I am
with them. From what I can see, I’m in enough credit to pay for a new PC. All
I need to do now is get that money back off of them. Beard Update: Oh, it’s awful.
I hate it *so* much…… At nine days of growth, this is now the
longest time during which I have ever had a beard. I have now officially
beaten the last beard growth of eight days over cub camp in August 2003. I
can’t help but feel it might look a bit better if it wasn’t quite so grey.
Between the on-line donations and the works-based sponsor form, the
sponsorship has now reached thirty quid. |
10 Mo-Vember 2009 (Tuesday) - Stuff, and a Rant Being on a late start today, I got up earlier
that I might have done and spent a while catching up on the trivia of life. I
started with looking at my leave for the next year. I’ve now booked twenty
five days holiday for some of the more important events in my life for the
leave year 2010-11. That’s organised of me… And then I sorted out my HPC
registration. In order to do my job I have to be on the State Register. I
sent off all the paperwork for that ages ago.
They’ve taken the money, but still no certificate in the post. Everyone else
has had theirs, so I phoned them up. Not only did they never receive what I
sent them, I never got the reminder they sent a fortnight ago. Funny how they
didn’t forget to take the money. Fortunately they emailed me what I
needed, so that’s now in the post to them. Let’s hope that don’t get lost
too. I then booked tickets for the BKF Xmas bash.
Despite sending out several emails, there are several people who didn’t
answer. I was going to be harsh and assume that no answer means people don’t
want to come, but I’ve sent another reminder to “the usual suspects”.
I’m not entirely convinced my list of email addresses is as up-to-date as it
might be. If any of my loyal readers would like me to book a space at the BKF
shindig, please let me know. Similarly, if anyone would like to come to the
ELO tribute concert in February, please email me so’s I can book tickets. A dental emergency. “Daddies Little
Angel TM ” had been up an in pain most of the night,
so I took her to the dentist. It’s at times like this I appreciate my DenPlan dental cover. Were it me, I would get the
treatment as part of the monthly payment that I make.
As this was under the NHS, that was fifty quid that I didn’t have straight
out of my pocket. And the NHS dentist was a rather foxy bird, too… Then I settled down to waste several hours
trying to book a visit to the chokey. Phoning the prison is a nightmare – I
once spent three and a half days trying to get through to them. This time I
got through after two rings. I was seriously impressed. I’m going to have a rant today. I haven’t
done that for a while. Sometimes I shouldn’t keep up with the
news. Most people want the latest in high-tech electrical wizardry.
Me – I generally settle for second best, but even so, I expect my household
gets through far more leccie than my parents ever
did when I was my son’s age. This is a feature of living in the twenty first
century. Now, it’s no secret that the leccie has
got to come from somewhere. And if we (as a society) carry on using it
at this rate, then within eight years there simply won’t be enough leccie to carry on. Serious power outages are predicted
by the year 2017. So the government has decided to build ten
new nuclear power stations. The opposition has had a dig at them in saying
that they’ve left it too long to make this decision. The NIMBYs have been
somewhat thwarted. Whilst the government is allowing public consultation,
it’s been made clear that saying “NO!” to every proposed power station
isn’t an option. The environmentalist lobby are up in arms. After all, that’s
what they do. But what choices do we have? Despite the
public perception that there’s been a massive surge in electricity generated
from wind farms, the fact is that the only There’s only so much fossil fuel that can be
burned, and burning it is demonstrably stuffing up the planet. So we are left
with three options. Use a LOT less leccie, pay for
wind and wave power (however much it costs) or build the nuclear power
stations. During the mid-eighties we used to use
radioactive stuff at work. Part of our daily routine was to monitor the
ambient radiation to check that nothing we were using had leaked in any way.
In late 1986 we detected radiation from the explosion at |
11 Mo-Vember 2009 (Wednesday) - Friendly Mutton Chops I’m now officially over a third of the way
through Mo-Vember, and the beard has had a serious
haircut. There was no denying that from an objective viewpoint, I had grown a
rather substantial beard. It was quite the envy of some of the less furry of
my fellow members of Team
O-Mo. However the thing itched like crazy and was making the area of
my neck around my collar quite sore. And (far be it from me to appear vain)
it was very grey. I had always planned to prune the thing in
mid-November anyway, so the haircut wasn’t entirely unexpected and was only a
few days early. Following remarks from the family that I looked like a hobo,
they might now think twice about commenting in future. I’ve gone for a style
known as the “friendly mutton chops”. Despite a search on the
Internet, I can’t work out what’s so “friendly” about it. Whilst I
absolutely loathed and despised the beard, I quite like the “chops”. I
think it makes me look Edwardian. I’m in a very small minority in thinking
that, but then, I’m used to being in a minority. Still, it can’t be all bad – together with
the various beards at work, the sponsorship is now at one hundred and thirty
quid. I had to re-boot my PC this morning as the
anti-virus email extension didn’t initialise. And again this evening as the
resident shield wasn’t active. (I have no idea what this means, I just
report the facts). I wonder if this is more evidence that my poor old PC
is on the way out. If so, I really need to be thinking about exactly what I
want from a new PC. After all, I bought this one purely to play NeverWinter
Nights 2, and I actually spent less than an hour on the game before going
back to the original. Back to the dentist - “Daddies Little
Angel TM ” wasn’t getting any better, and so we
asked to bring next week’s appointment forward. I got to stand and watch
whilst she had a root canal filling done. Now I’ve watched it done, and have in the past had one done myself. I know
which I prefer. On the way to work I bought some bottled
beers for the weekend (just in case). Tesco were knocking them out at
three bottles for four quid. But at the weekend we’d been into Waitrose, and
I’d seen “Blues” in there. I do like that stuff, and fancied a couple
of bottles of it. So to Waitrose where I only got two bottles for my four
quid. And I checked their salads again. Even though Tesco’s have increased
the prices of theirs by 10p, Tesco are still over a quid cheaper (and you
get more). I’m reliably informed that Waitrose stuff is better quality.
Let’s just hope that for their sake there are enough people who are prepared
to pay for that quality. Meanwhile Tesco’s are handing out toffee-nut lattes
to all and sundry. Cheaper, and free coffee too. I know where I’m going
shopping in future… And then to Brian’s house for tea. Him and
the Bat have been getting all culinary. A smashing bit of scoff – must do
that again soon….. |
12 Mo-Vember 2009 (Thursday) - Reflecting on Old Times I was clearing out some old tat from work,
and I found a picture drawn by one of the temps about ten years ago. You can
probably guess which one is me. Over the years, a lot of people caricatured
in the piccie have left – there are only three of
us left from when this was drawn. One has left my line of work and became
head of science in a secondary school in a remarkably short period of time.
Five have taken promotion to other hospitals. Three have taken internal
promotion. One has gone part time. Three have retired. One resigned and was
last heard of somewhere off the coast of Tonight I could have gone to
the scout group AGM with er indoors TM . I
chose not to. I just know what would have happened. There would have been a
whole load of guilt laid on me about how they are crying out for leaders, and
how they want me back. It’s now a year (and a bit) since I packed up
with cubs and I don’t want to go back. I can’t get there for 5.30pm, so on the
nights I could get there, I would always be late. And bearing in mind that my
shifts are often given at rather short notice, I couldn’t guarantee to be
along every week. And when I was a leader, I always thought that having an
unreliable leader was worse than having no leader at all. For twelve years I turned up religiously at (pretty
much) every event that took place. Over the years I had some fun. I must
have enjoyed it, to have kept going for so long. However most of my memories
are of the obnoxious brats and the “spanners” who spoiled it for all
the decent kids. If I were to go back, it would be on the strict
understanding of “no brats or spanners whatsoever”. I don’t care how
discriminatory that sounds, or actually is. Let me elaborate: If a child has problems physically or
mentally, but wants to take part, then fine. I would welcome them. However: If the child is so bewildered by going to
cubs that all they can do is stare in amazement, then they shouldn’t be
there. If the child is too terrified to even try to
join in, then they shouldn’t be there. If the child would rather spend the evening
head-butting the wall or biting himself (and we had *loads* of those),
then they shouldn’t be there. If the child does nothing but cries
constantly, then they shouldn’t be there. If the child cannot shut up when asked to do
so, then they shouldn’t be there. If the child cannot go for more than a minute
without the need to start fighting with other children, then they shouldn’t
be there. And if the child is forced along (against
their will) by parents who know cheap baby sitting when they see it, then
they shouldn’t be there. In all the years that I was there, despite my
protests we never chucked any brat out. And there were some very *special*
cases, and some evil, nasty little thugs too. If I were to return I would
reserve the right to chuck a brat out. With no recourse to appeal. And the money. Despite having a very healthy
bank balance, the scout association was (in my experience) a right
load of penny pinchers. We would bend over backwards to subsidise people with
more money than me. But over my last year in scouting (and the
time following) there have been three events that have really put me off
going back.
But that is just making justification for my
real reason of not wanting to take up the woggle again. Quite simply, I don’t
want to. I’ve done my bit. And I’m becoming a grumpy old git. I don’t have
the patience I once had. It’s time for someone else to have a go. I remember
many years ago when I was a leader in the Boys Brigade being told that the
average leader in a youth organisation serves for two years. I did six times
the national average. I think I’ve done my bit…. Meanwhile in |
13 Mo-Vember 2009 (Friday) - Another Day Up with the lark as always,
and having a bit of time spare I thought I’d check my emails.
Disaster. My PC wouldn’t connect to the Internet. I fiddled about for a while
but to no avail. I then spent the day with a sense of dread. It’s amazing how
lost I felt. Being away from the PC didn’t help at all. Without the Internet
at home I felt as though something was missing. Imagine my amazement when I
came home this evening to find it was all circuits go. Mind you, whilst at Tesco’s this morning, the
cashpoint machines weren’t working. I am going to hope that the Internet failure
was in some way connected to the cashpoint failure, and blame it all on the
awful weather. Home from work via the pet shop. “Daddies
Little Angel TM ” has money to burn,
and has decided she wants a pet. It’s against my better judgement, but
she has bought herself a pair of guinea pigs (both boys) and
associated paraphernalia. I just transported the whole lot home. “Spider-Pig”
and “As Yet Unnamed” (Dave) seem sweet enough, if you like
guinea pigs. Which I don’t, especially. A missive arrived from the chokey – “Norman
Stanley” seems in good form, despite his basketball team losing their
most recent match 110-8. For no adequately explained reason, despite losing
by 102 points, the “Harlem Globetrotters” were pleased with the game,
and thought it their best yet. And he’s still not received the mucky
postcards I sent in two weeks ago. Odd how a whole grumble mag can get
through, but two mucky postcards get censored… I just hope this rain stops soon….. |
14 Mo-Vember 2009 (Saturday) - The plan was to have a lie-in this morning as
I wasn’t going to work, and the vicar doesn’t clang his bell on Saturdays.
Trouble is, the longer I lay in bed, the more my back hurts, so I was up and
about and checking emails by 8.30. Several hundred emails – mostly all spam. One
of the few that wasn’t delivered photos from a session that the astro club did last night with a scout group in
Folkestone. They’ve done quite a few of those lately. Bearing in mind my rant
from Thursday night, I can’t help but think that if this is the direction in
which the astro club is going, I think I probably
did the right thing in taking more of a back seat with the thing. I’m not
saying that doing these presentations is bad – far from it. But it’s just not
“me” any more. “Norman Stanley” phoned this morning –
he’s managed to lacerate the top of his thumb with a plastic knife. Silly
beggar. I suppose that’s his lame excuse to get out of the next basketball
game. He also said that whilst he likes puzzle books, he’s not keen on word-searches.
I wonder if that’s a tactful way of saying he’s fed up with the impossible
crosswords I send him? To the petrol station to get petrol and some
cash. My card again didn’t work in the cashpoints at both Tescos
or the one in the co-op. I drove to town to swear at
the bank, but couldn’t park anywhere. So I went home to phone the bank to
swear at them. Having gone all through the automated fiddle-around, I was
just about to get through to someone when I realised I’d been using a card
that expired three months ago. Woops. So back to Tesco’s to get some cash.
Beer doesn’t buy itself, you know… And so to As it turned out, despite the dire weather of
the morning, I didn’t actually need my coat. There was a bit of a torrential
downpour whilst we were at the station, but we were under cover. The train
was a bit delayed. Apparently there were trees on the line somewhere near
Maidstone which was having a knock-on effect, but Brian and I arrived
in One of the things I like about being a roving
reporter for Beer in the
Evening is going back to pubs to see if they have changed over
time. I see from previous blog entries that it’s a couple of years since I
last did a Rye-based pub crawl. So my reviews we out of date, and therefore
what might have been mistaken for a booze-up was actually justifiable
research. We made our way to the Pipemakers
Arms, which two years ago I rated as 6/10 (average). It’s gone
downhill. Whilst we were not made unwelcome, it is clearly a “locals”
pub, and the landlord doesn’t seem to actually have the ability to speak. At
all. Which wasn’t overly welcoming. We stayed long enough for the rain shower
to pass, and chatted with one of the locals about his drink of lager &
light ale (never seen that one before) before moving on, having scored
it 4/10 – could do better. We moved up to the Standard which was just
round the corner. Oh, the rain had chucked it down whilst we were in the Pipemakers. But we were dry, and that was the last shower
of the day. The Standard is somewhere I’ve always included on my We trudged up the hill with (I must admit)
heavy hearts. My mobile was on overload with texts from friends and family
crying off because of the foul weather. Which was such a shame because the
weather was actually fine for the evening. We
stopped some passing coppers and checked that we’d be alright to have a beer
in the street later, and twenty yards later saw us in the And then up to the Union Inn. Which I’ve
raved about in the past, but in all honesty isn’t all that I crack it up to
be. They had a couple of barrels of ale on the counter (Jennings
Cumberland and Harvey’s Best) and we settled down for the evening. To be
honest we use this pub because of it’s location,
rather than anything else. It’s just up the hill from one of the widest parts
of the procession route, and so makes for good viewing. Whilst here we got a
text from Steve who’d made his way to the Although our group was considerably smaller
than it has been in previous years, by the time a load of friendly bonfire
boys and a drunken rabble of ex-cub scouts arrived there were over a dozen of
us. Having shouted at the procession and done the obligatory cigar, we then
moved over to the YpresCastle for some
more beer. Despite having the best ale selection in Checking my photos I see I’ve got a wonderful
photo to put on CrackWatch. Same time next year ….. |
15 Mo-Vember 2009 (Sunday) - Dull Sunday In 2005 when I did my post-graduate certificate
as part of developing a reflective nature (!) my tutor suggested that I
compiled a “top ten” of my year’s events. Bearing in mind I do seem to
be slightly more active than the average badger, I can remember having some
difficulty coming up with that list. Not so much in making the list, more in
deciding what events didn’t make the top ten. It was for the year 2005 – 06,
and the So, today was something of an anticlimax.
Which was probably for the best, as I was feeling just a tad under the
weather. I eventually emerged from my pit about 11am and put up an album
of photos from last night on Facebook. And then I did some
research. I can remember Ashford having a bonfire parade in years gone by –
we used to come over to march round with the Boys Brigade band in the late
70s and early 80s. But I could find no mention on the Internet at all about
it. Perhaps it’s something that could be revived? “Spider-Pig” is now up to being
handled. If you like that sort of thing. I’m not sure if I do. A minor hiccup with the Sunday roast
dinner. ‘er indoors TM managed to lose the
meat. I’m not sure quite what went wrong, but the meat was missing.
Fortunately it turned up (eventually), but I’m afraid that today was
so dull that missing pork chops was as good as it got. Which was surprising, considering tonight was
one of the Doctor Who specials. We watched it after bowling. Having it on the
SkyPlus box meant we could have watched it anytime,
but I’d rather have watched it before I got told what happened. And if you
haven’t seen it, what happens is….. Let’s just say that the last few Doctor Who
episodes have had a similar theme. They start good, and about two thirds of
the way through you can spot the point at which it just goes down the pan…. |
16 Mo-Vember 2009 (Monday) - A Day in the Life Sometimes the tales of British so-called justice
make me want to cry. On the way home from work tonight the radio told the sad
tale of an ex-soldier who is facing five years imprisonment. His crime –
whilst out and about he found a shotgun. So, rather than leaving it where
children might find it, he took it to his local police station. Where he was
charged with illegal possession of a firearm. And a court has found him
guilty. Well, he pleaded guilty. He was. He had the firearm in his
possession. The fact that he was handing the thing in to the police is
utterly irrelevant. He had the gun in his possession,
therefore he’s broken the law. Sentencing has been delayed. Hopefully for the
judge to look up “common sense” in a dictionary. Whilst on the subject of judicial injustices,
whilst printing off letter to the chokey #43 last night, I ran out of black
ink. So after work I went round to Staples to get more. I also picked up a
shredder as my current one is broken, and they were half price. And then took
ages to get home as a car had driven into a bus on what was once the ring
road. And the mutton chops are doing fine. I’ve put
up an album of our Mo-Team
on Facebook. There’s now eight of us. I know that beards is rather against the rules, but it’s all in a good cause.
And some of the beards are more prominent than others. The sponsorship
money promised is now over one hundred and sixty quid. All for a
good cause and in two week’s time I can have a shave. I’m getting just a
little bit fed up with having to explain to everyone that I meet that the
beard is a joke, it’s being sponsored, I don’t actually think that it’s
clever. |
17 Mo-Vember 2009 (Tuesday) - The Shops I’d arranged to be on a late start today – my
new specs were ready for collection, so I was up the town by 8.30am. There’s
something very unfriendly about the shops in Ashford at the moment. They’ve
all got heavy-duty security shutters. Or, that is, the ones in the precincts
(mall to my American readers!) have. The ones up the high street (open
to the public 24/7) don’t seem to need them, but the shops in a secure
locked up area have them. Odd how the security of the mall isn’t enough, but
there’s no problems up the High Street (!) And I find these shutters really
off-putting. Perhaps I’m just a sensitive soul. Whilst waiting for the opticians to unbolt
their portcullis, I thought I’d do a spot of Xmas shopping. “Thought”
being the operative word. What are billed as “Xmas
ideas” are a con. “A nice pen for Xmas” – what a rip-off.
Everyone’s already got hundreds of biros. Why shell out good money for a
poncy pen you’re only going to lose. Or jewellery. Overpriced tat !! Or
books. I see there’s a new “Adrian Mole” book. For twenty quid. Or a “River
Cottage” book for twenty two quid. I’m not paying that. At the other end
of the scale Woolworths (or the building that was once Woolworths)
have re-opened with the gimmick of “everything’s 99p”. And, in all
honesty, that’s a rip-off too. I don’t think the Pound Shop (everything’s
a quid) has much to worry about. I eventually got my new specs. It’s amazing
how much clearer everything is – especially the close up stuff. I just need
to remember to see how much of the cost I can get refunded from work. And then some shopping on the way to work –
B&Q for some proofing jollop for the roof. The tills at B&Q were fun.
The “normal people” really couldn’t cope with the self-service tills.
One pair of pensioners were nearly in tears being utterly unable to scan any
barcodes, and another retard just held up his purchase to the machine and was
hoping for the best. In the end, a whole load of store staff came and worked
the checkouts for them. It was rather pitiful to watch, and I must admit to a
sly smile when the chap in front of me refused help with the till – declaring
loudly that he wasn’t a total pillock. Tesco had much the same self-service
arrangement, but the “normal people” there have figured out how to
work the checkouts - to the disgust of the Tesco staff who were itching to
help. I got some new green tea – there was a two for the price of one deal.
And I’ve found a tea which isn’t utterly disgusting: “Fresh & Fruity”
(!) with cranberry, raspberry and elderflower is actually rather drinkable. Home to an empty house. As ‘er
indoors TM was flogging candles and I was on a late
finish, we didn’t have the usual Tuesday night houseful. I quite missed it… |
18 Mo-Vember 2009 (Wednesday) - Dentists and Laundry Regular readers may recall I visited the
dentist a fortnight ago, only to be brushed off with “come back if it
don’t get better”. I went back today. The chap I usually see was on
holiday, and so I explained the problem to his stand-in. To be fair to the
chap, his spoken English was (probably) better than my spoken Urdu,
but there was still just the teensiest problem with communication. His
immediate reaction was to refer me to the hospital to have the problem wisdom
tooth removed. Which was my plan, too. But then he had a change of heart. He
announced it would be foolish to remove it if it wasn’t being troublesome. I
reminded him that the thing regularly swells so much that I can’t close my
jaws. He wasn’t convinced. I also pointed out that I’d been to the dentist
twice in two weeks about it. How troublesome did the tooth have to be? He
conceded defeat, and said that if the hospital hasn’t contacted my by Xmas, I
should chase things up. And I found out today that I am “trailer
trash”. During the summer months I stick my laundry outside on the line
to dry it after the wash. Despite the environmentally friendliness of it, did
you know that six the
use of clothes lines And
we get asked to cut down on the amount of energy we use… |
19 Mo-Vember
2009 (Thursday) - Leccie Bills, Holiday, and a
Prison Visit I wonder how many more times I will
be back to the chokey before he’s released? |
21
Mo-Vember 2009 (Saturday) - D.I.Y. and Booze With
all of the family out for the evening, I settled down to NeverWinter. These
orcs and goblins don’t kill themselves, you know… |
24
Mo-Vember 2009 (Tuesday) - The Meaning of Life (Part Five) |